How to Read “Love makes you waste away”
Suki ni wa mi wo yatsusu
Meaning of “Love makes you waste away”
“Love makes you waste away” means that when you become obsessed with someone you love or something you’re passionate about, you stop caring about your appearance and how you look.
When you’re completely absorbed in romance, you pay less attention to your clothes, hairstyle, and grooming. You end up looking shabby to everyone around you.
This proverb is often used with a slightly critical tone when observing someone in love. The person is so consumed with thoughts of their beloved that they don’t notice the change.
But to others, it’s obvious their appearance has become messy compared to before. People use this saying to point out or warn about such behavior.
Even today, this expression fits when you see someone so absorbed in romance or hobbies that they’ve neglected taking care of themselves.
Origin and Etymology
No clear written records explain the origin of this proverb. However, we can make interesting observations from the words themselves.
The verb “yatsusu” is an old word meaning “to lower one’s status or appearance” or “to make oneself shabby.” This expression has been used since the Heian period.
When noble people disguised themselves as commoners, they were said to “yatsusu.” You often see scenes in Noh and Kabuki where aristocrats appear in travel clothes, having “yatsushita” themselves.
This proverb likely emerged from sharp observations of how love changes human behavior. The leading theory suggests it became established during the Edo period as common people’s way of describing those consumed by romance.
The phenomenon of becoming so preoccupied with someone you love that you lose interest in your appearance has been observed throughout all eras.
The expression “mi wo yatsusu” carries the nuance of “changing from one’s original form.” This perfectly captures the powerful force of romantic love.
When people fall in love, their values and priorities shift dramatically. Our ancestors expressed this essential human truth in simple, concise words.
Usage Examples
- She’s completely experiencing “love makes you waste away” lately – she used to dress so stylishly, but now her clothes are careless
- That girl has been in a “love makes you waste away” state since falling in love, neglecting herself so much that people around her are worried
Universal Wisdom
The proverb “Love makes you waste away” sharply captures the dual nature of human passion. Being absorbed in something is wonderful, but it also carries the danger of losing consideration for yourself.
Not just in romance, when people are strongly attracted to something, everything else becomes invisible. In their desperate desire to see their beloved, they neglect not just their appearance but even eating and sleeping.
When absorbed in hobbies, they ignore work and relationships. This state is a universal human trait seen across all times and cultures.
Our ancestors left us this proverb to acknowledge the beauty of passion while warning against losing balance. Being absorbed in something and taking care of yourself don’t have to conflict.
Rather, only when you can maintain yourself can you build a healthy relationship with what you love.
This proverb has been passed down through generations because people in every era have struggled with balancing passion and reason.
Knowing the joy of being absorbed while not losing yourself – that wisdom is the eternal theme this proverb asks us to consider.
When AI Hears This
Research shows that when people fall in love, their brains release more than twice the normal amount of dopamine. This dopamine intensely stimulates neural circuits called the reward system, creating a state similar to drug addiction.
What’s fascinating is that when this state continues, the neural circuits themselves physically change. In other words, the brain’s wiring is literally rewritten.
Even more surprisingly, brain imaging studies confirm that just thinking about someone you love decreases activity in the prefrontal cortex. The prefrontal cortex handles rational judgment and risk assessment.
In other words, the brain of someone in love is automatically programmed to overlook dangers. This is the neuroscientific identity behind the expression “waste away.”
The runaway reward system has an even more troublesome characteristic: tolerance formation. You can’t feel satisfied with the same stimulation anymore and seek stronger stimulation.
The escalating behaviors people take for their beloved stem from this plasticity of neural circuits – their tendency to change. Ancient people accurately captured this phenomenon in words without knowing anything about brain mechanisms.
Lessons for Today
What this proverb teaches modern people is the importance of balancing passion with self-care. Being absorbed in someone or something you love enriches your life.
But if you neglect yourself, that relationship won’t last long either.
In modern society, things that grab our attention overflow – not just romance, but work, social media, and hobbies. The danger of sacrificing health, grooming, and relationships while absorbed in something may be higher than in the past.
That’s exactly why the wisdom of this proverb shines.
What matters isn’t denying being absorbed in something, but aiming to balance it with taking care of yourself. Because you’re meeting someone you love, you want to look presentable.
Because you’re devoted to something you love, you want to maintain your health and deliver your best performance. Such a positive attitude will make your life shine brighter.
Having passion while not forgetting kindness toward yourself – that’s the message this proverb gives to those of us living today.


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