How to Read “Go to where someone left, but don’t go to where someone died”
Sariato e wa yuku tomo shiniato e wa yuku na
Meaning of “Go to where someone left, but don’t go to where someone died”
This proverb teaches that following after someone who has left is acceptable, but following after someone who has died is not.
Specifically, taking over a job someone quit or moving into a place where someone used to live is fine. But you should never take your own life just because someone you loved or respected has died.
This expression draws a clear line between life and death. Following after living people can lead to new possibilities and growth. But following after the dead means wasting your own life.
Today, this proverb speaks to people who consider suicide after losing someone important. It also helps those trapped in overwhelming grief.
The message is positive and forward-looking. No matter how painful things are, there is hope as long as you keep living.
Origin and Etymology
There are no clear historical records showing when this proverb first appeared. However, we can understand its origins by looking at how the words are structured.
The contrast between “where someone left” and “where someone died” forms the heart of this proverb. “Where someone left” refers to places after someone has moved away, quit a job, or departed.
“Where someone died” literally means following after the dead.
This contrast reflects traditional Japanese views on life and death. Where someone has left while still alive, possibility and hope remain. Following in their footsteps can lead to new developments.
But following after the dead means taking your own life.
During the Edo period, some people practiced junshi – dying to follow their lord or spouse in death. However, this practice gradually became rejected.
The idea that living people should continue living gained wider acceptance. This proverb likely became established during this historical shift.
It served as a lesson teaching the preciousness of life. The clear contrast in the words themselves made a deep impression on people’s hearts.
Usage Examples
- I was assigned to the department after my senior quit, but as they say “Go to where someone left, but don’t go to where someone died,” so I’ll work hard to take over properly
- I understand wanting to follow your husband after losing him, but “Go to where someone left, but don’t go to where someone died” – your life has value
Universal Wisdom
Behind this proverb lies a struggle between deep human grief and the will to keep living. When you lose someone you love or respect, overwhelming loss crashes over you.
When that pain becomes too great, the impulse to “follow them” may arise. This is perhaps a natural human emotion.
But our ancestors saw the danger in this feeling. When you’re in the midst of grief, your vision narrows. Death can seem like the only solution.
That’s why this proverb clearly separates “where someone left” from “where someone died.” It draws an unshakable boundary between living and dying.
Humans have a beautiful ability to inherit someone’s will or work. This is only possible between the living.
Following after the dead, however, can negate the very meaning of that person’s life. The deceased would never want those left behind to die.
This proverb acknowledges the depth of grief. Yet it conveys human wisdom: continuing to live is the greatest respect for the deceased and your responsibility to yourself.
When AI Hears This
Where someone has left, “information” remains – their behavior patterns and decision-making criteria. At a workplace where a predecessor quit, you can infer “why they made that choice” from handover documents and colleagues’ memories.
The information flow hasn’t been cut off. But when following after the dead, the information about their future completely vanishes. “What they would have experienced and how they would have judged” is gone forever.
In information theory, more observable information enables more accurate predictions. Where someone left, past data accumulates. You can learn from it and build your own strategy.
Death, however, is a state where entropy has maximized. It’s an endpoint where “nothing more can be extracted.” Like thermodynamic laws, once information disperses, it cannot be recovered.
What’s more interesting is that human decision-making is essentially a battle against “information asymmetry.” People who choose where someone left are making probabilistically favorable choices from incomplete but existing information.
People who choose where someone died are gambling with zero information. This proverb teaches: “Judge life’s choices by the amount of information available.”
Lessons for Today
This proverb teaches you the importance of courage to choose life while facing grief. Modern society brings many forms of “loss” – not just losing loved ones, but shattered dreams and broken relationships.
In such times, this proverb guides you to distinguish “what to inherit” from “what to let go.”
Inheriting someone’s will, work, or feelings connects their life’s proof to the future. This is positive inheritance that contributes to your own growth.
But you don’t need to sacrifice yourself to chase someone else’s life. Excessive self-sacrifice or self-denial helps no one.
You who live in modern times have the right to value your own life. No matter how painful the separation, your life belongs to you.
Moving forward step by step while carrying grief – that is both the privilege and responsibility of the living. This proverb gives you permission to keep living.
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