Third Time Honesty: Japanese Proverb Meaning

Proverbs

How to Read “三度目の正直”

Sandome no shōjiki

Meaning of “三度目の正直”

“Third time honesty” is a proverb meaning that even if the first and second attempts result in failure or don’t go as planned, the third attempt will surely succeed.

This proverb expresses the process of human learning and growth. The first attempt fails due to lack of experience or preparation, and the second attempt doesn’t yield the desired results because one is either too conscious of the previous failure and becomes tense, or conversely becomes careless. However, by the third attempt, one can approach the task in the best possible state, utilizing past experience while maintaining appropriate tension. It is used to encourage someone who is taking on a challenge, or to motivate oneself. It’s also used as an expression of expectation for someone facing their third attempt. Even today, in important life situations such as exams, interviews, and marriage proposals, it’s used in phrases like “it’s third time honesty, so this time for sure,” and is cherished as words that give hope and courage.

Origin and Etymology

The origin of “Third time honesty” is deeply connected to ancient Japanese beliefs about numbers. Since ancient times, the number “three” has held special meaning in Japan. In religious contexts too, such as Buddhism’s “Three Treasures” and Shinto’s “Three Sacred Treasures,” the number three has been considered sacred.

Behind the birth of this proverb lies keen observation of human behavioral patterns. The idea is that the first attempt often fails due to insufficient preparation, the second fails because one becomes overly cautious, and only on the third attempt does one finally achieve a state that combines appropriate tension with experience. This expression can be found in Edo period literature and was widely used among merchants and craftsmen.

Particularly interesting is the use of the word “honesty” here. While in modern times it’s often used to mean “not lying,” in classical language it had a stronger meaning of “correct and direct” or “straight,” meaning “only on the third attempt do things finally proceed straight.” This can be said to be a crystallization of ancestral wisdom that beautifully expresses the human learning process. It’s a truly profound proverb that expresses the persistent spirit of Japanese people with their “third time’s the charm” mentality.

Usage Examples

  • For this qualification exam, it’s third time honesty – I’ll definitely pass
  • My proposal to her is also third time honesty – it should work out this time

Modern Interpretation

In modern society, “Third time honesty” has come to take on new meanings. In our information society, the process of learning from failure has accelerated, and we often find answers through search before attempting three times. However, this is precisely why the value of this proverb is being rerecognized.

In the business world, the concept of “fail fast” is gaining attention. This means failing quickly to learn quickly, which can be said to be the modern version of “Third time honesty.” In startup companies, the cycle of learning from the first failure, improving from the second failure, and achieving success on the third attempt is considered important.

On the other hand, in modern times, the question “what if you fail even on the third attempt?” has also arisen. In today’s world where the lifetime employment system has collapsed and job changes have become normal, rather than giving up after three attempts, an attitude of continuing to challenge oneself repeatedly is now required.

Also, with the spread of social media, failures have become more visible in modern times, and it’s said that the psychological hurdle for a third attempt has increased. However, even so, the message of “don’t give up and keep going” that this proverb carries continues to be a great encouragement for modern people.

When AI Hears This

The reason “third time’s the charm” is beloved worldwide lies in a cognitive mechanism called the “rule of three” that our brains possess. According to psychological research, our brains only solidify information into memory as a “reliable pattern” after three attempts. The first time is “coincidence,” the second time is “chance,” and only on the third attempt do we finally judge there to be “a systematic pattern.”

This cognitive trait is also supported anthropologically. In all major world religions—Christianity’s Trinity, Buddhism’s Three Jewels, and Hinduism’s Trimurti—the number “3” is considered a sacred number of completion. Even in folk tales, patterns where the story concludes on the third attempt, like “The Three Little Pigs” or “three wishes,” are overwhelmingly common.

What’s even more fascinating is the discovery from neuroscience. The human prefrontal cortex works most efficiently when processing three pieces of information simultaneously, but its processing ability drops dramatically when dealing with four or more. In other words, “3” represents the limit of human cognitive capacity.

“Third time’s the charm” isn’t merely words of encouragement—it’s the linguistic expression of an “brain optimization strategy” that humanity discovered over tens of thousands of years. The reason success rates are higher on the third attempt is because our brains only complete serious pattern learning for the first time on that third try.

Lessons for Today

What “Third time honesty” teaches us today is the importance of having the courage to continue challenging ourselves without fearing failure. Giving up after just one or two failures is wasteful.

In modern society, we tend to be pressured for immediate results, but truly valuable things are built up over time. Even if you can’t get into the company you want through job hunting, even if you’re rejected in love, even if you fail a qualification exam, these are merely waypoints. What’s important is what you learn from those experiences and how you apply them next time.

This proverb gently teaches modern people, who tend to fall into perfectionism, that “failure is a stepping stone to success.” There’s no need to blame yourself for the first failure. There’s no need to despair over the second setback. On the third attempt, there you are – stronger and wiser, carrying the treasure of your previous experiences.

Life is a long journey. No matter how many times you fall along the way, as long as you get up and keep walking, you will surely reach your destination.

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