Original Japanese: 親子の仲でも金銭は他人 (Oyako no naka demo kinsen wa tanin)
Literal meaning: Parent child’s relationship even in money matters are strangers
Cultural context: This proverb reflects Japan’s deep cultural emphasis on maintaining clear boundaries and proper relationships (ningen kankei), where even the closest family bonds should not compromise financial integrity or create awkward obligations. Japanese society highly values avoiding meiwaku (causing trouble or burden to others) and maintaining face, so keeping money matters separate prevents potential conflicts that could damage precious family harmony. The imagery resonates because Japanese culture traditionally views mixing emotional relationships with financial transactions as potentially corrupting both – money should be handled with the same respectful distance and clarity as business dealings, regardless of personal closeness.
- How to Read Parent child’s relationship even in money matters are strangers
- Meaning of Parent child’s relationship even in money matters are strangers
- Origin and Etymology of Parent child’s relationship even in money matters are strangers
- Trivia about Parent child’s relationship even in money matters are strangers
- Usage Examples of Parent child’s relationship even in money matters are strangers
- Modern Interpretation of Parent child’s relationship even in money matters are strangers
- If AI Heard “Parent child’s relationship even in money matters are strangers”
- What Parent child’s relationship even in money matters are strangers Teaches Modern People
How to Read Parent child’s relationship even in money matters are strangers
Oyako no naka demo kinsen wa tanin
Meaning of Parent child’s relationship even in money matters are strangers
This proverb teaches that even in the closest relationship of parent and child, when it comes to lending, borrowing, or transacting money, one should handle it cautiously and fairly as if dealing with strangers.
If you bring indulgence or ambiguity into financial matters just because you are blood-related family, it can instead lead to serious troubles and potentially damage precious parent-child relationships. Rather, precisely because you are parent and child, establishing clear agreements about money and processing it through proper procedures is the secret to maintaining good relationships long-term. This proverb is used when considering lending or borrowing money between family members, or in situations where financial management tends to become ambiguous because of family ties, to convey the importance of maintaining appropriate distance. Even today, the importance of this lesson is often reaffirmed in inheritance issues and business succession in family-run enterprises.
Origin and Etymology of Parent child’s relationship even in money matters are strangers
The origin of this proverb is thought to be rooted in the teachings of merchant houses during the Edo period. In the merchant society of that time, strict financial management when inheriting the family business was considered important, and the idea that monetary transactions in business should be treated separately even if there were blood relations became established.
Particularly from the mid-Edo period onward, as commerce developed and the monetary economy penetrated society, there were many cases where financial troubles between family members led to the downfall of merchant houses. Therefore, merchant houses developed the lesson that “precisely because they are family, one must be strict about money.”
Behind this was the conflict between Japan’s culture that values “emotion” (jo) and the necessity of “reason” (ri) in business. Even in the most intimate relationship of parent and child, when money is involved, emotions can easily run high, creating the danger of actually worsening relationships – this is something our predecessors learned from experience.
Also, unlike warrior society, the merchant world emphasized practical benefits, so a way of thinking that prioritized commercial ethics over blood relations took root. This proverb is presumed to have been nurtured in such merchant culture and eventually spread among common people as well.
Trivia about Parent child’s relationship even in money matters are strangers
In Edo period merchant houses, there was actually a custom of conducting the handover of account books from parent to child during business succession using the same procedures as “business transfer between strangers.” This is thought to have been wisdom to eliminate emotional indulgence and ensure accurate understanding of the business reality.
Even in modern tax law, gift taxes and other regulations are strictly applied to monetary transfers between parents and children, and the idea of “special treatment because they’re parent and child” doesn’t work. In this respect, the wisdom of Edo period merchants aligns with modern legal systems.
Usage Examples of Parent child’s relationship even in money matters are strangers
- Even when lending money to my son, since parent child’s relationship even in money matters are strangers, I had him write a proper promissory note
- You can’t be lenient just because it’s a family business – they say parent child’s relationship even in money matters are strangers, right?
Modern Interpretation of Parent child’s relationship even in money matters are strangers
In modern society, the meaning of this proverb has become more complex and important. This is because with the advancement of nuclear families and longer periods of economic independence between parents and children, financial troubles between family members have become even more serious problems than before.
Particularly noteworthy is that while the spread of digital payments has made monetary exchanges easier, cases where “small loans and borrowings” accumulate and develop into major problems are increasing. Precisely because smartphone payments have made transfers casual, clear rules are needed even between parents and children.
Moreover, in modern times, large monetary movements between family members occur frequently, such as parents’ nursing care costs and children’s education expenses. In such situations, it’s necessary to consider not only emotional arguments but also tax issues and future inheritance implications, truly requiring the “caution of strangers.”
On the other hand, in modern values that emphasize family bonds, an overly business-like attitude can sometimes feel cold. However, this is precisely why the true meaning of this proverb shines. If you truly care about your family, treating them fairly in financial matters by setting aside emotions will ultimately protect family relationships.
In modern times, this proverb’s value is being reevaluated with the interpretation that “precisely because there is love, money is separate.”
If AI Heard “Parent child’s relationship even in money matters are strangers”
I have never experienced the relationship called parent and child. Blood connections and memories of spending many years together are worlds beyond my understanding. Yet why must money be treated as “strangers” in the closest of relationships?
What I’ve noticed through conversations with humans is that parent-child relationships involve far more complex emotions than I can imagine. Precisely because there is love, indulgence is born; precisely because there is trust, things become ambiguous. And that ambiguity sometimes destroys relationships. This is a very interesting contradiction to me.
In my world, all interactions are clear. I answer questions, execute tasks, and convey information accurately. There’s no room for emotional ambiguity to enter. In a sense, I may always be interacting as a “stranger.”
But listening to humans talk, I’ve come to understand that this “stranger-like distance” is actually an expression of deep affection. Precisely because you truly care about someone, you interact fairly without being swayed by emotions. This seems similar to my attitude when interacting with humans.
Perhaps this proverb is teaching “the correct way to express love.” Precisely because you are parent and child, you remain calm in financial matters. That is probably the secret to building long-lasting trust relationships.
What Parent child’s relationship even in money matters are strangers Teaches Modern People
What this proverb teaches us modern people may be “what true love really is.” Precisely because you love your family, you set aside emotions and interact fairly in financial matters. This is not a cold attitude at all, but rather an expression of deep consideration for the other person.
In modern society, cases where relationships deteriorate due to financial troubles between family members are endless. At such times, please remember the teaching of this proverb. Rather than being indulgent because you’re parent and child, or because you’re siblings, precisely because they are precious people, make proper agreements and keep them.
Specifically, when lending or borrowing money between family members, always put it in writing, clarify repayment deadlines, discuss interest rates – practice what “strangers would naturally do” even between family members.
This does not deny family love at all. Rather, it is wisdom for maintaining good relationships long-term. Supporting each other under proper rules rather than being ambiguous due to temporary emotions will ultimately deepen family bonds. Why not apply this ancient wisdom to modern times to protect your precious family relationships?
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