How to Read “A man should be more than his resignation”
Otoko wa jigi ni amare
Meaning of “A man should be more than his resignation”
This proverb teaches that men should value courtesy and manners, and being overly polite is just right. It means that in human relationships, it’s better to be excessively polite rather than slightly lacking in courtesy, as this leads to fewer mistakes.
This saying is often used when teaching young men about social interactions or when preparing them for entering society. When you think “this much courtesy is probably enough,” going one step further with politeness ensures your respect reaches the other person more reliably.
Even today, this teaching applies well in business settings and first meetings. Being too polite rarely causes offense, but lacking courtesy can easily destroy trust.
That’s why having excess courtesy is just right.
Origin and Etymology
Clear records about the exact source or when this proverb was created don’t seem to exist. However, the structure of the phrase reveals an interesting background.
“Jigi” refers to courtesy and manners, especially formal etiquette like bowing and greetings. “Amare” is the command form of “amaru,” meaning “to have excess” or “to overflow.”
In other words, the teaching is that courtesy should be excessive rather than insufficient.
The samurai society likely influenced the birth of this phrase. In the warrior’s world, lacking courtesy could be fatal. Showing respect to others wasn’t just good manners.
It was an important way to demonstrate one’s character and avoid unnecessary conflicts.
The phrase specifically targets men with “otoko wa” (a man) because men in that era had more opportunities to appear in public and interact with others. For men living in the outside world, politeness was like protective armor.
Being excessively polite wouldn’t displease others and would actually create a good impression. This proverb contains such practical wisdom.
Usage Examples
- I teach new employees that a man should be more than his resignation, but young people these days tend to take courtesy lightly
- When my son got a job, I gave him the words “a man should be more than his resignation”
Universal Wisdom
In human relationships, courtesy holds a mysterious power. This proverb has been passed down for so long because it captures a truth that never changes as long as people interact with each other.
We all want to be treated with care. We sensitively pick up from others’ attitudes how they think of us. Politeness is exactly that message of “I value you” given form.
What’s interesting is that this proverb teaches “amare” (have excess) rather than “just right.” As human psychology goes, the discomfort we feel when courtesy is lacking stays strongly in our memory.
But feeling someone is too polite rarely causes discomfort. Instead, it creates the impression that “this person is sincere.”
Also, the act of showing full courtesy doesn’t just benefit the other person. It also elevates your own character. By behaving politely, your own mind becomes organized and calm develops.
This isn’t just empty formality but part of self-cultivation.
Our ancestors understood the importance of safety margins in human relationships. Courtesy is just right when excessive. This wisdom comes from deeply observing the subtle emotional movements that arise between people.
When AI Hears This
Information theory proves that transmitting messages accurately through noisy communication channels requires more than the minimum information. For example, communication with space probes involves sending the same data multiple times or adding extra error-correction bits.
This “redundancy” is the key to ensuring reliable transmission.
Human relationships have the same structure. Even if you respect someone, that’s an invisible internal state. You can’t send it directly to the other person’s brain, so you must convert it into a physical signal like a bow.
However, the communication channel of human relationships always contains “noise” like the other person’s fatigue, preconceptions, and the atmosphere. A minimal nod has a high probability of being buried in this noise, preventing your respect from reaching them correctly.
That’s why “amare” (have excess). A deeper bow, more polite words, slightly longer time with your head lowered. These may seem wasteful, but in information theory terms, they function like error-correcting codes.
As Shannon’s communication theory shows, reliable communication always requires redundancy. Japanese etiquette systematized through experience what is mathematically the optimal communication protocol for human relationships.
Lessons for Today
In modern society, efficiency is so valued that some view courtesy as “wasteful formality.” However, this proverb reminds us of something important. “Politeness” in human relationships is never wasteful.
Even in email and message exchanges, using language that feels slightly too polite prevents misunderstandings and gives the other person a sense of security. This is even more true for face-to-face communication.
Greeting politely, expressing thanks in words, listening to others until they finish. These small accumulations build trust.
What’s especially important is understanding that courtesy exists not just “for others” but also “for yourself.” By behaving politely, your own mind becomes calm, and you can interact with people confidently.
Courtesy is a means of expressing your character as a person.
When you think you’re being slightly too polite, that’s just right. This mindset will enrich your life.
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