How to Read “Women are heaven for the eyes, purgatory for the wallet, and hell for the soul”
Onna wa me no tengoku, saifu no rengoku, tamashii no jigoku
Meaning of “Women are heaven for the eyes, purgatory for the wallet, and hell for the soul”
This proverb frankly expresses three different aspects of relationships with women. First, “heaven for the eyes” means that a woman’s physical beauty brings visual pleasure.
Next, “purgatory for the wallet” refers to the financial burden and hardship that comes from supporting or dating women.
Finally, “hell for the soul” indicates that women can bring mental anguish and inner conflict.
This proverb is mainly used when men talk about the complex reality of relationships with women. It expresses an ironic recognition of reality.
Men are attracted by surface charm, but they end up paying a heavy price both financially and mentally. Today, this expression would likely be seen as sexist and requires caution when using it.
However, historically it existed as a phrase that succinctly captured the gap between ideals and reality in relationships between men and women.
Origin and Etymology
There appears to be no clear written record of this proverb’s origin. However, we can make interesting guesses from its form of expression.
The three-stage expression of “heaven,” “purgatory,” and “hell” is thought to reflect a Christian worldview. The concept of purgatory is especially characteristic of Catholic doctrine.
It refers to a place of purification between heaven and hell. If this proverb originated in Japan, there is a theory that it was probably formed during the late Edo period to the Meiji era.
This was when contact with Western culture increased.
The three perspectives of “heaven for the eyes,” “purgatory for the wallet,” and “hell for the soul” capture human experience in three dimensions. These are visual pleasure, economic burden, and mental suffering.
This structure shows the wisdom of evaluating one subject from multiple angles. It becomes an expression that sharply points out the gap between surface beauty and inner reality.
It is highly likely that this became established as a uniquely Japanese expression while being influenced by Western proverbs and sayings.
Similar expressions exist in other cultures. However, this expression using three-stage religious metaphors is distinctive.
Usage Examples
- After getting married, he started complaining that women are heaven for the eyes, purgatory for the wallet, and hell for the soul
- He jokingly warned his single friend that women are heaven for the eyes, purgatory for the wallet, and hell for the soul
Universal Wisdom
The universal wisdom this proverb shows is a truth. Humans are easily attracted to visual appeal, but behind that appeal lies hidden costs.
We are captivated by beautiful things. However, obtaining and maintaining them comes with a greater price than we imagine.
The reason this saying has been passed down for so long is because it deals with a universal theme. This is the gap between human desire and reality.
The experience of judging only by surface appeal and building relationships, then facing unexpected difficulties later, has been repeated across time.
What is especially interesting is that this saying distinguishes three different dimensions: visual, economic, and spiritual. Human relationships are never one-dimensional.
They have multilayered effects on our lives. Behind visible joy lurks invisible burden and suffering.
Our ancestors warned about the danger of superficial judgment through the contrast between outward beauty and inner harshness. This applies not only to romance and marriage.
It suggests the danger of making decisions based only on visual appeal in all choices. Humans are weak against sensory pleasure and tend to lack the ability to see long-term effects.
This reflects the unchanging human nature.
When AI Hears This
The second law of thermodynamics teaches that “entropy always increases in a closed system.” This means usable energy always changes into unusable forms.
This proverb depicts exactly that process in human relationships.
The initial “heaven for the eyes” is a low-entropy state, meaning an ordered state. It is complete with visual information alone, with minimal energy input or dissipation.
However, as the relationship progresses, it shifts to “purgatory for the wallet.” What deserves attention here is that high-quality energy called money begins to flow out in one direction.
Money spent on dates and gifts never returns to its original form, just like heat dispersing. In physics, “energy that cannot be recovered as work” is considered lost.
This is exactly that state.
The final stage, “hell for the soul,” is the maximum entropy state, meaning complete disorder. Even invisible energy like emotions and time dissipates and becomes unrecoverable.
In thermodynamics, the iron rule is irreversibility: “once entropy increases, it does not naturally decrease.” This proverb shows the same one-way direction.
What is interesting is that “the quality of invested energy” deteriorates through all three stages. From low-cost vision to money, then to the soul, an unrecoverable resource.
This perfectly corresponds to the process where high-quality electrical energy ultimately becomes unusable heat.
Lessons for Today
What this proverb teaches us today is the importance of not being deceived by surface appeal. We need to develop the ability to see things from multiple angles.
Being captivated by beautiful and attractive things is a natural human response. However, we need the power to calmly face the reality that lies ahead.
In modern society, everything is visually refined and attractively packaged. Products, services, and even human relationships tend to be judged by their appearance.
However, what truly matters is considering the overall long-term impact that relationship or choice will bring to you.
This lesson is not limited to romance and marriage. In all life choices—choosing jobs, homes, friendships—it is important to develop the habit of thinking beyond initial impressions.
Consider ongoing costs and mental effects as well.
There is no need to deny surface beauty. Just understand that it is not everything, and have the wisdom to look at invisible parts too.
That becomes the first step toward making choices with fewer regrets. The quality of your life will greatly change through this deep insight.
Comments