How to Read “女房と畳は新しい方が良い”
Nyoubou to tatami wa atarashii hou ga yoi
Meaning of “女房と畳は新しい方が良い”
The original meaning of this proverb expresses a male desire: “Just as tatami mats are more comfortable when new, wives are better when young.”
However, this doesn’t simply treat women as objects. In the context of the Edo period, this was often used as a joke or playful banter among men, and did not represent serious values regarding actual marital relationships. Rather, it was a type of humorous expression that deliberately exaggerated men’s selfish desires that couldn’t be fulfilled in reality, intended to provoke laughter.
In the society of that time, divorce was actually not easy, and couples generally spent their entire lives together. Therefore, this proverb is thought to have functioned as a form of escapist humor. It was used in situations such as casual remarks among men at drinking parties or when expressing daily complaints in an amusing way. In modern times, it’s necessary to understand the historical context behind this proverb and view it as a historical expression.
Origin and Etymology
Exploring the origins of this proverb reveals that it is deeply rooted in the common people’s lifestyle culture of the Edo period. In Japanese homes of that time, tatami mats were central to daily life. Tatami mats underwent regular surface replacement and flipping, and newer ones had better fragrance, elasticity, and comfort.
Meanwhile, the etymology of the word “nyoubou” (wife) comes from the rooms called “nyoubou” where women resided in the imperial court during the Heian period. However, by the Edo period, it had become established as a general term referring to wives or women who handled household duties.
The background to the birth of this proverb lies in the male-centered society of the Edo period. At that time, patriarchy was strong, and it was common to discuss domestic life from a male perspective. This expression that treats tatami mats and wives in parallel may seem uncomfortable to us today, but it was a phrase that reflected the social conditions of that time.
Since similar expressions can be found in Edo period senryu poetry and rakugo storytelling, it’s believed to have been an expression widely enjoyed among common people. However, rather than expressing men’s true feelings, it seems to have been used more often as playful banter or jokes.
Interesting Facts
Tatami mats in the Edo period were far more expensive than today, and replacing tatami surfaces was a major expense for ordinary commoners. Therefore, “new tatami” was also a symbol of luxury goods, and this proverb is thought to have included the meaning of “longing for unattainable luxury.”
Interestingly, in Edo period senryu poetry, there also existed the completely opposite expression: “wives and tatami mats are better when old.” This expressed “the goodness of familiar things,” showing completely different values using the same subject matter.
Usage Examples
- People used to say “Wife and tatami mats are better when new,” but thinking about it now, that’s outrageous
- My grandfather often joked that “Wife and tatami mats are better when new,” but those didn’t seem like words from someone who had been with grandmother for 50 years
Modern Interpretation
In modern society, this proverb is clearly viewed as representing outdated values. Now that gender equality is taken for granted, this expression that treats women like objects would cause discomfort for many people.
However, interestingly, the structure of this proverb still exists in different forms today. For example, many people think that digital devices like smartphones and computers are “better when new,” and similar values can be seen regarding fashion and cars. In other words, the fundamental human desire for “longing for new things” continues to exist across time periods.
On the other hand, there are also active movements in modern times to reconsider “the value of old things.” Attention to vintage items, the importance of long-term human relationships, and interest in sustainability show values that are completely opposite to this proverb.
Particularly in human relationships, there is a strong tendency to value “depth” and “trust” over “newness.” The bonds of couples who have been together for many years and friendships built over time are being rerecognized for their value. This proverb could be said to function as a symbol of “values that should be reconsidered” for modern people.
When AI Hears This
During the Muromachi period, tatami mats were far more luxurious than we can imagine today. A single tatami mat cost the equivalent of a commoner’s entire annual income, making them an ultimate status symbol accessible only to the upper classes like samurai and court nobles. Simply being able to say “tatami mats are better when new” was itself proof of overwhelming economic power.
From this perspective, the true meaning of this proverb emerges. This wasn’t merely practical wisdom, but rather an expression of values held by “men wealthy enough to frequently replace their tatami mats.” In an era when commoners lived on straw or woven mats, even discussing “new tatami” was a mark of the privileged class.
What’s particularly fascinating is how this expression, which places women alongside tatami mats, vividly reveals women’s position in that hierarchical society. Just like the luxury item that was tatami, women were also treated as “possessions” that demonstrated a man’s social status.
When people quote this proverb today, most assume tatami are common household items, but they’re actually unconsciously voicing the “values of the ultra-wealthy” – a deeply ironic situation. While the value of objects changes over time, the power structures behind them remain fossilized within our language.
Lessons for Today
What this proverb teaches us today is the important truth that “values change with the times.” Ways of thinking that were once taken for granted can become unacceptable today. This is also proof that we are growing.
At the same time, this proverb makes us think about the “longing for new things,” which is a fundamental human desire. New things certainly have appeal. But is newness really the only thing of value?
In modern society, the value of things that can be used for a long time and things that gain character over time is being reconsidered. The same applies to human relationships. Things built over time, such as trust and understanding, are far more precious than superficial newness.
Around you too, there must be things you’ve cherished for many years and important people with whom you’ve spent time. Try focusing on such “old but valuable things.” You’ll surely make new discoveries. This proverb might be asking us “what is true value?”
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