How to Read “盗人を捕らえて見れば我が子なり”
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Meaning of “盗人を捕らえて見れば我が子なり”
This proverb describes a situation where you catch someone who has committed wrongdoing only to discover it is your own child, expressing the complex emotional state of being torn between the desire to uphold justice and parental love.
Specifically, it depicts the inner conflict experienced by someone in a position that values social justice and morality when they try to correct wrongdoing, only to find that the target is a family member or loved one. This proverb expresses the complexity of human relationships and emotional subtleties that cannot be resolved simply with the sense of justice that “those who do wrong should be punished.”
The situations where this proverb is used are mainly when facing the mistakes of family members or close friends. It is used to express situations where one is caught between the sense of duty to do what is right and feelings of love and compassion for that person. Even in modern times, it is sometimes used when people are troubled about how to deal with discovering wrongdoing or mistakes by family, friends, or colleagues. This expression is used because it can succinctly express the complexity of human emotions.
Origin and Etymology
The origin of this proverb is said to come from expressions found in Edo period literature. In the society of that time, family bonds were even stronger than today, and it is thought to have emerged as a way to express the complex emotions in parent-child relationships.
The Edo period was an era with a strict class system and strong emphasis on family honor and appearances. In such times, having someone in the family commit wrongdoing was viewed as a more serious problem than mere crime. Particularly in merchant families, wrongdoing by family members was strictly condemned as a serious matter affecting the family business’s credibility.
What this proverb expresses is precisely the complex human emotions born from such historical background. It expresses the heart that wavers between the desire to catch wrongdoers and carry out justice, and parental love when that person turns out to be one’s own child.
Confucian values are thought to have influenced the establishment of this expression. Confucian teachings that value parent-child affection while also emphasizing social justice likely gave birth to proverbs expressing such complex emotions. The reason it has been passed down through the ages is precisely because it accurately expresses this universal human inner conflict.
Usage Examples
- A supervisor who discovered a subordinate’s misconduct is troubled about disciplinary action with the feeling of “When you catch thief and look it is your own child”
- Learning of the betrayal by a junior colleague they had cherished for years, it was truly “When you catch thief and look it is your own child”
Modern Interpretation
In modern society, the situations this proverb expresses have become more complex and frequent. More people are experiencing similar emotions in various situations such as discovering misconduct within organizations, problematic behavior by family members on social media, and troubles between family members.
Particularly in the information society, the actions of people close to us have become more visible, increasing opportunities to learn about things we might have remained unaware of before. There are discoveries unique to the digital age, such as inappropriate comments by family members on social media or problematic workplace behavior by friends.
While modern values emphasize individual autonomy and diversity, compliance and social responsibility are also strictly demanded. This makes it difficult to “turn a blind eye” even to problems involving family members. Companies have established internal whistleblowing systems, and parents are held strictly accountable for their children’s problematic behavior.
However, the essence of this proverb – “the conflict between love and justice” – remains unchanged in modern times. Rather, because choices have diversified and judgment criteria have become complex in modern times, many people likely experience this emotional state. However, it is also true that in modern times, the definition of “justice” itself has diversified, making it more difficult to judge what constitutes the right response.
When AI Hears This
The reason parents fail to notice their children’s wrongdoing lies in how the brain works. In psychology, this is called “confirmation bias,” a phenomenon where people unconsciously gather only the information they want to believe. In other words, when parents have the assumption that “my child is a good child,” they search only for evidence supporting this belief and overlook inconvenient signs.
Even more fascinating is a brain function called “selective attention.” For example, when you buy a red car, you start noticing red cars everywhere on the street. Similarly, the more loving parents are, the more their attention focuses only on their child’s positive aspects, making problematic behaviors literally “invisible” to them.
Actual research shows that while parents can accurately judge aggressive behavior in other people’s children, they underestimate such behavior in their own children by about 30%. The deeper the love, the stronger this tendency becomes.
Most shocking is the “paradox of proximity effect.” The physically closer someone is to us, the harder it becomes to see their complete picture. For parents who are with their children every day, changes in their children occur too gradually to notice. It’s the same principle as not noticing changes in your own face.
This proverb sharply points to the “cognitive blind spot” that the beautiful emotion of love possesses. The insight of our ancestors, who expressed the complexity of the human heart in just a few words, is truly remarkable.
Lessons for Today
What this proverb teaches modern people is that there are no perfect answers in human relationships. Wavering between a sense of justice and love, between ideals and reality, is not weakness but rather an expression of human richness.
What is important is not to blame yourself for having such conflicts. When facing the mistakes of someone close to you, there is no need to rush to find an answer immediately. By accepting complex emotions and taking time to face them, better solutions may become visible.
This proverb also teaches us the importance of understanding others’ positions. When someone is troubled by problems involving family members, rather than easily judging that “naturally this is what should be done,” we need an attitude of empathizing with that person’s complex emotional state.
While modern society tends to demand clear black and white distinctions, it is natural for human relationships to have gray areas. The wisdom of balancing love and responsibility while accepting such ambiguity may be the gift this proverb has left for us.
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