How to Read “この親にしてこの子あり”
Kono oya nishite kono ko ari
Meaning of “この親にしてこの子あり”
“This parent being this child exists” is a proverb meaning that a child’s character and behavior are strongly influenced by their parents, and by observing the parents, one can understand what kind of person the child is.
This proverb expresses how parents’ daily words, actions, and values are unconsciously passed down to their children. Since children grow up watching their parents, they naturally acquire both their parents’ good and bad aspects. It is used in situations when observing a child’s behavior and thinking “this is indeed the parent’s influence,” or when noticing similarities between parent and child.
The reason for using this expression is to recognize the deep connection in parent-child relationships and to become aware of the weight of parental responsibility. It also shows the importance of considering the family environment and parental influence that lie behind a child’s behavior when trying to understand it. Even today, it is frequently used when expressing the important role parents play in children’s education and character formation.
Origin and Etymology
The origin of “This parent being this child exists” is thought to trace back to Chinese classics. Particularly in Confucian teachings, the importance of parental influence on children’s character formation has been preached since ancient times.
This proverb is presumed to have been introduced to Japan along with Buddhist and Confucian thought from China. In Japan, from the Heian period onward, a culture that valued family lineage and bloodline took root in aristocratic society, and it is believed that this expression became established within such social background.
During the Edo period, not only among the samurai class but also among townspeople, the inheritance of family businesses and maintenance of family traditions became important, and this proverb came to be used more widely. Particularly in merchant families, where store credibility and business practices were often passed from parent to child, this proverb became rooted in people’s lives, combined with the idea that “children grow up watching their parents’ backs.”
Even during the modernization process from the Meiji period onward, in Japanese society that valued the family system, it continued to be used as an expression describing parent-child relationships, leading to the present day.
Usage Examples
- Seeing that child’s politeness, I can’t help but admire that this parent being this child exists
- After being warned about my son’s rough language, I’m reflecting that this parent being this child exists
Modern Interpretation
In modern society, the interpretation of the proverb “This parent being this child exists” has become complex. Traditional family structures have diversified, and with the increase in nuclear families and dual-income households, there is a current situation where the time parents and children spend together has decreased. Furthermore, with the spread of the internet and social media, children have come to absorb many pieces of information and values from sources other than their parents.
In educational settings, this proverb is sometimes problematized for leading to criticism of parents or prejudice against children. Particularly when children exhibit problematic behavior, there are cases where unilateral judgment as “parental responsibility” creates excessive burden on families and labeling of children.
On the other hand, modern psychology and educational research has scientifically proven the importance of parental influence. Through attachment theory and social learning theory, it has become clear that parent-child relationships definitely have an impact on children’s character formation.
However, in modern times, it is recognized that “environmental factors” such as school, peer relationships, media, and local community also greatly influence children’s growth. Therefore, this proverb is often understood with the perspective that “parental influence is important, but it’s not everything.” In modern society that recognizes diverse family forms, a more flexible and comprehensive viewpoint is required.
When AI Hears This
“Like parent, like child” is actually not about genetics, but about the tremendous influence of the “environment” that parents create.
Twin studies have revealed surprising facts. When identical twins are raised in separate households, despite having the same genes, they develop significant differences in personality and abilities. In other words, what shapes a child is not bloodline but “what kind of environment they grow up in.”
For example, in families where parents read books, children naturally become fond of reading too. This isn’t because there’s a “reading gene,” but because the environment where books are readily available and where children see their parents enjoying reading is what transforms the child.
Adoption studies show similar results. Even without blood relations, the values and habits of adoptive parents become deeply ingrained in children. Educational background, career choices, and even the way they laugh become similar.
In other words, the true meaning of this proverb is not “parental genes determine a child’s destiny,” but rather “the daily environment that parents create determines a child’s future.” This is a heavy responsibility for parents, but it’s also a source of hope. It means that if you consciously create a good environment, children will inevitably develop in a positive direction.
Lessons for Today
What this proverb teaches modern people is the importance of self-reflection. By being conscious of the influence we give to children as parents, it becomes an opportunity to strive to be better role models. At the same time, it gives us the courage to objectively view what we inherited from our parents, cherish the good parts, and change the parts that need improvement.
In modern society, it’s important to understand this proverb not as “determinism” but as a “starting point.” Parental influence certainly exists, but it doesn’t determine everything. Rather, by knowing our roots, we can walk our own life path more consciously.
Also, when observing other people’s children, this proverb cultivates a compassionate heart. We can understand that there are family circumstances behind problematic behavior and hold feelings of support rather than criticism. Parents aren’t perfect either. Everyone is trying through trial and error to leave something better for the next generation. Being able to have such a warm perspective might be the most important message this proverb conveys to modern times.
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