How to Read “Nothing is harder to please than a child, and nothing is easier to please than a parent”
Ko hodo yorokoba se nikui mono wa naku oya hodo yorokoba se yasui mono wa nai
Meaning of “Nothing is harder to please than a child, and nothing is easier to please than a parent”
This proverb means that making children happy is extremely difficult, but making parents happy is actually very easy. It encourages people to practice filial piety once they understand this truth.
Children constantly want new things and quickly get bored with what they receive. Their demands arise one after another, making it hard to keep them satisfied.
But parents are different. They feel genuine joy from even the smallest gesture of care or kind word from their children.
This proverb is used when teaching the importance of filial piety. It helps people who think “pleasing parents is difficult” realize that parents are happy with simple acts of thoughtfulness.
Even today, this saying reminds us how important it is to express gratitude to our parents.
Origin and Etymology
There are no clear records about the exact source or when this proverb was created. However, its structure suggests it emerged from traditional Japanese views on family and filial piety.
This proverb uses a parallel structure. It places two contrasting ideas side by side: “nothing is harder to please than a child” and “nothing is easier to please than a parent.”
This contrast highlights the essential nature of parent-child relationships.
During the Edo period, Confucian ideas about filial piety spread widely among common people. Caring for parents was considered the most important virtue. Many moral instruction books were published during this time.
This proverb likely spread as a saying that encouraged filial piety in that cultural context.
What’s interesting is that this proverb isn’t just moral preaching. It’s based on observation of human psychology.
Children constantly seek new things and are hard to satisfy. Parents, meanwhile, are deeply moved by even small gestures from their children.
This contrast contains a truth that many people can understand from experience. Such universal human observation is what made this proverb endure through generations.
Usage Examples
- They say nothing is harder to please than a child, and nothing is easier to please than a parent, so I think I’ll visit my parents’ home next holiday
- You don’t need to overthink filial piety—after all, nothing is harder to please than a child, and nothing is easier to please than a parent
Universal Wisdom
This proverb reveals the fundamental asymmetry between human desire and love. Why are children hard to satisfy while parents are easy to please?
It’s because of the psychological difference created by being on the receiving side versus the giving side.
Children are beings who constantly grow while looking forward. What satisfies them today becomes ordinary tomorrow. They keep seeking new stimulation and experiences.
This is an instinct necessary for growth as living beings. Because they never know satisfaction, people can improve and open up new worlds.
Parents’ joy is completely different in nature. For parents, their child’s very existence is already a great joy.
Any expression of love from their child, no matter how small, holds special meaning. This is because parents find joy in giving.
The fact that their child remembered them or cared about them is enough to fill their hearts.
This proverb has been passed down through generations because this truth never changes with time. In human relationships, the joy of giving is deeper and easier to obtain than the joy of receiving.
This wisdom contains a universal truth that applies not just to parent-child relationships but to all human connections.
When AI Hears This
The asymmetry of joy between parents and children can be explained through information theory’s “prediction error.” In information theory, unpredictable events hold higher information value.
In other words, greater surprise leads to greater joy.
From a child’s perspective, parental behavior has extremely high predictability. Parents wake at the same time daily, use similar words, and praise in the same patterns.
A child’s brain builds a behavioral model of parents from vast data. Even receiving a gift falls within predicted range: “Oh, it’s my birthday.”
Small prediction error means low information value, limiting the emotional range of joy.
From a parent’s perspective, however, children are unpredictable systems. A child suddenly masters the pull-up bar they couldn’t do yesterday. Their interest shifts from dinosaurs to space.
A rebellious, silent child suddenly talks about future dreams. Growth is a non-linear change that constantly defies parental prediction models.
This high prediction error generates great information value.
For example, when parents cry seeing their child’s drawing, it’s because they encountered unexpected information: “I never knew my child could express this.”
In information theory terms, parents constantly receive high-bit new information from their children. This information asymmetry is the true identity of joy asymmetry.
Lessons for Today
This proverb teaches modern people that making loved ones happy isn’t as difficult as you think. We tend to believe “we must do something special.”
But what truly matters is communicating your feelings.
This wisdom is especially important for relationships with the parent generation. In busy daily life, you might postpone filial piety.
But parents don’t want expensive presents or luxurious trips. They just want to know you’re doing well and to hear from you occasionally. That’s enough.
This teaching applies to all human relationships. Words of gratitude, small gestures of care, the fact that you thought of someone—these cost nothing but can deeply warm someone’s heart.
There’s something you can do starting today. One phone call, one message—that’s all it takes to make someone smile.
Giving happiness is much easier than you think.
Comments