How to Read “Acting tough after the fight is over”
Kenka sugite no karaibari
Meaning of “Acting tough after the fight is over”
“Acting tough after the fight is over” means there’s no point in showing bravery after a conflict has ended. It describes people who stay silent during an actual fight or confrontation, unable to say or do anything.
But once everything is over and the other person is gone, they suddenly act tough. They say things like “I was going to tell them off” or “I wasn’t scared of them at all.”
This proverb criticizes people who fail to act when courage is needed, then put on a false show of bravery later. If you truly had courage, you should have acted in the moment.
Acting tough when it’s safe has no value. In fact, people around you will see you as cowardly and vain.
We still see this behavior today. Someone can’t speak up in a meeting but complains behind closed doors later. Or they can’t say something directly but post it on social media instead.
This proverb teaches us the importance of having courage when action is needed. It also shows us how meaningless it is to act tough after the fact.
Origin and Etymology
No clear written records explain the origin of this proverb. However, the structure of the phrase suggests it reflects the everyday sensibilities of common people during the Edo period.
The expression “kenka sugite” (after the fight) uses “sugite” to indicate the passage of time. It means after the tense situation of a fight has ended and everything has calmed down.
“Karaibari” refers to empty bravado – acting tough without any real substance behind it.
In Edo period townspeople’s society, fights and arguments were everyday occurrences. People clashed in many situations: neighborhood disputes in the tenement houses, business disagreements, and various other conflicts.
In this context, everyone could see certain people clearly. These people stayed quiet during the actual fight. But once the other person left, they’d act tough.
They’d say “I was really going to tell them this” or “I’m not scared of that guy.” To those watching, this behavior looked ridiculous and pathetic.
This proverb likely emerged as a sharp expression pointing out human weakness and vanity. People who couldn’t do anything in the actual moment would say brave things once they were safe.
The phrase captures this essential human trait perfectly. It was born from the lived experience of ordinary people.
Usage Examples
- He couldn’t argue back during the presentation, but now he’s acting tough after the fight is over, just complaining about everything
- I couldn’t stop the bullying when it happened, so acting righteous now would just be acting tough after the fight is over – I need to reflect on that
Universal Wisdom
“Acting tough after the fight is over” has been passed down through generations because it perfectly captures a fundamental human weakness and vanity.
Everyone feels fear in moments when courage is needed. When facing an opponent, your heart pounds violently. Words catch in your throat. Your legs shake.
In such moments, most people choose silence. But once you leave that situation and feel safe, something strange happens. Courage suddenly appears.
You think “I should have said this” or “I wasn’t really scared.” You start justifying yourself in your mind.
This might be a human defense mechanism trying to protect self-esteem. Admitting you were cowardly is painful. So people act tough afterward to convince themselves “I really did have courage.”
But our ancestors saw through this psychology. Acting tough afterward is just empty bravado. True courage means taking action in the moment, even while feeling fear.
This proverb contains deep insight. It shows understanding of human weakness while also questioning what real courage truly is.
Times may change, but human psychology doesn’t. People still face fear and try to deceive themselves about it. That’s why these words still resonate with us today.
When AI Hears This
During a fight, the human body activates the sympathetic nervous system. Adrenaline gets released. Heart rate increases and blood concentrates in the muscles.
In this state, reaction speed actually improves and pain sensitivity decreases. So acting tough during a fight has physiological backing.
But after the fight ends, the body takes about 20 to 30 minutes to shift to parasympathetic dominance. Adrenaline decreases within minutes.
However, the stress hormone cortisol actually peaks later. At this timing, the body becomes more prone to fatigue and anxiety. The fighting ability from before is now gone.
What’s interesting is that this physiological weakening happens simultaneously with psychological self-defense. When cortisol rises, the amygdala in the brain activates.
This makes people overestimate the threat they faced. Then cognitive distortions emerge: “I wasn’t wrong” or “They were the bad one.” The body is weak, but the mind desperately tries to justify itself.
So acting tough after a fight is a physiologically explainable phenomenon. It’s an attempt to bridge the gap between a body that can’t fight and wounded self-esteem.
When you’re truly strong, you don’t need to act tough. The weaker you become, the more you put on false bravado. It’s an ironic mechanism created by the time lag between human body and mind.
Lessons for Today
This proverb teaches us that courage must be demonstrated “now, in this moment.”
You’ve probably experienced this yourself. A meeting where you couldn’t say what needed to be said. Wrongdoing you should have stopped. Someone’s dignity you should have defended.
At the time, various reasons kept you from acting. But later, you thought “I really wanted to do something.”
This proverb isn’t blaming us, though. Rather, it’s encouraging us to prepare for the next opportunity.
Once you understand how meaningless it is to act tough afterward, you’ll want to take action “in the moment” next time. You don’t need to be perfect.
A trembling voice is fine. Imperfect words are fine. What matters is taking that one step when the moment requires it.
And even if you couldn’t act, being honest is better than acting tough later. Simply admitting “I couldn’t find courage then” is far more sincere and leads to growth.
Acknowledging your weakness is actually the first step toward your next act of courage. Your small courage today creates big changes tomorrow.
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