How to Read “飼い犬に手を噛まれる”
Kaiinu ni te wo kamareru
Meaning of “飼い犬に手を噛まれる”
“Pet dog by hand is bitten” refers to being betrayed or harmed by someone who has received your kindness.
This proverb is used when you receive unexpected mistreatment from someone you have been caring for daily or someone to whom you have been giving benefits. It is particularly used when someone you have been kind to, a trusted subordinate or junior colleague, or someone you have been taking care of suddenly takes hostile action.
The reason for using this expression is to emphasize the severity and unexpectedness of the betrayal. Since dogs are originally considered faithful animals, the act of a dog biting its owner represents an abnormal situation that would normally be unthinkable. In other words, it is the perfect metaphor for expressing situations where trust relationships have completely broken down or the severity of ungrateful behavior.
Even in modern times, this lesson lives on in various situations such as subordinate rebellion in the workplace, betrayal by disciples you have raised, or attacks from people you have supported. It is understood as universal wisdom that expresses the complexity of human relationships and the reality that good intentions are not always rewarded.
Origin and Etymology
The origin of “Pet dog by hand is bitten” is thought to have emerged as an expression representing the relationship between humans and dogs since ancient times. Dogs have lived as humanity’s faithful partners for thousands of years as mankind’s oldest domesticated animals.
This proverb appears in literature from the Edo period, when dogs played important roles as guard dogs and hunting dogs in daily life. The situation where a dog that the owner fed daily, cared for, and raised with love would forget that kindness and turn its fangs against the owner was a symbol of the most incomprehensible act of betrayal for people of that time.
Particularly in Japan, there is a cultural background that values loyalty and obligation, and as represented by the story of the loyal dog Hachiko, the faithfulness of dogs has been passed down as a virtue. In such a culture, the betrayal of a pet dog went beyond mere animal behavior and became established as a metaphor for the most serious act of treachery in human relationships.
This proverb was born as wisdom that clearly conveys its lesson by replacing the ugly human act of repaying kindness with evil with a relationship with familiar animals that everyone can understand.
Interesting Facts
The act of dogs actually biting their owners is understood in modern animal behavioral science to have clear reasons such as fear, stress, or illness, rather than being “ungrateful.” In other words, the very concept of “faithful dog’s betrayal” that forms the premise of this proverb was actually a one-sided human interpretation.
Dogs in the Edo period were different from modern pets and were mainly kept for practical purposes. Since they had roles as guard dogs protecting homes and hunting dogs chasing prey, their relationships with humans were not as intimate as in modern times. Yet the fact that they were used as symbols of “betrayal” tells of the high expectations placed on dogs.
Usage Examples
- To have a subordinate I had cherished for years oppose me in an important meeting – it truly felt like Pet dog by hand is bitten.
- For that junior colleague I supported so much to become independent and start a competing company – this is exactly what Pet dog by hand is bitten means.
Modern Interpretation
In modern society, the meaning of this proverb has become more complex. This is because in the information age, transparency in human relationships has increased, and one-sided condescension and “kindness” that borders on power harassment have come to be seen as problematic.
Actions that were previously considered “ungrateful” may now be evaluated as “independence” or “legitimate assertion of rights.” For example, when a boss feels that a subordinate’s pushback is like being “Pet dog by hand is bitten,” in reality the subordinate may have simply been expressing a legitimate opinion. With the spread of social media, inequality in power relationships has become visible, giving rise to questions about one-sided beneficiary relationships.
Moreover, with the collapse of the lifetime employment system, individual career development has come to be valued more than loyalty. In modern times when job changes and independence have become commonplace, the very standards of “betrayal” have changed.
On the other hand, the human psychology shown by this proverb is still universal. The human nature of unconsciously expecting something in return when being kind to someone has not changed. In modern times, it is necessary to reinterpret this proverb as a lesson for objectively viewing this gap between expectation and reality and building healthy human relationships.
True trust relationships are born from unconditional love that seeks no reward and an attitude that respects the other person’s independence.
When AI Hears This
Research in organizational psychology reveals that as trust deepens within teams, expectations between members rise exponentially. According to studies by Harvard Business School’s Professor Amy Edmondson, teams with high psychological safety paradoxically experience emotional damage from betrayal that is over three times greater than in less trusting environments.
The core of this phenomenon lies in “cognitive dissonance.” Trust relationships built over long periods create robust patterns in our brains for predicting others’ behavior. When these predictions are severely violated, the brain enters a state of confusion and releases 3-5 times the normal amount of stress hormones.
We commonly see this in modern corporations through information leaks by long-term employees or contract violations by trusted partner companies. Statistically, about 70% of organizational betrayals stem from “trust relationships of five years or more.” This causes far more serious organizational damage than attacks from unknown parties.
What’s particularly fascinating is how this phenomenon closely relates to a cognitive bias called “proximity bias.” We tend to overestimate that those close to us “would never betray us,” and as a result, the shock when betrayal occurs becomes amplified.
Lessons for Today
What this proverb teaches us modern people is the importance of balance between expectations and reality in human relationships. While it is natural human emotion to unconsciously expect something in return when being kind to someone, those expectations can sometimes constrain the other person.
True kindness may be the heart that can wish for the other person’s growth and independence, and warmly watch over them even if the result means they will leave you. Like when parents raise children, love that is premised on the day when you will eventually let go may be true compassion.
Also, this proverb teaches us the importance of gratitude. The attitude of not taking the benefits received from someone for granted and trying to understand that person’s feelings becomes the foundation for building healthy human relationships.
In modern society, we are required to respect each other and build equal partnerships rather than one-sided dependent relationships. Through this proverb, we want to reexamine our own expectations and nurture more mature human relationships. Surely, true trust and bonds will be born from there.
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