How to Read “夫婦喧嘩は犬も食わない”
Fuufu genka wa inu mo kuwanai
Meaning of “夫婦喧嘩は犬も食わない”
This proverb means “people other than the parties involved should not interfere in marital quarrels.”
Disputes between spouses, even when they appear intense on the surface, actually have deep bonds and complex circumstances that only the two of them can understand. It is impossible to truly understand the real causes and background just by observing from the outside. Therefore, when a third party intervenes with good intentions or takes sides, it may actually make the situation worse.
This proverb is used when witnessing marital quarrels or when receiving consultation about them. It is used to express the judgment that it’s better not to get involved, as in “Those two seem to be quarreling intensely, but husband wife quarrel even dog does not eat.” Even in modern times, when encountering troubles between colleague couples or friend couples at work, the wisdom of these words is still fully applicable. It is a teaching from our ancestors who understood the subtleties of human relationships, showing us the importance of not intervening carelessly and maintaining distance.
Origin and Etymology
The origin of this proverb has an interesting background. This expression, which has been used since the Edo period, is a metaphor that skillfully utilizes the characteristics of dogs as animals.
Dogs are omnivorous and are known as animals that basically eat anything. They happily consume leftovers, bones, and even things humans have thrown away. The fact that even such dogs “do not eat” something means it’s something they really don’t want to get involved with.
The background to the birth of this expression is thought to be the nagaya (tenement) culture of the Edo period. In nagaya separated by thin walls, the sounds of neighboring couples’ quarrels could be heard clearly. However, even with such close proximity to these events, the common people’s wisdom was embedded in the idea that it was wise not to stick one’s nose into other people’s marital problems.
The expression “even dog does not eat” is also used in similar proverbs like “parent-child quarrels even dog does not eat,” and it became established as a set phrase expressing the position of third parties toward the complex emotional entanglements within families. In this way, using the habits of dogs, a familiar animal, to express the subtleties of human relationships shows the richness of Japanese sensitivity toward language.
Usage Examples
- The neighboring couple is arguing loudly again, but husband wife quarrel even dog does not eat, so let’s leave them alone
- A friend complained to me about their marriage, but thinking that husband wife quarrel even dog does not eat, I just nodded along appropriately
Modern Interpretation
In modern society, new complexities have emerged in the interpretation of this proverb. With the spread of SNS and messaging apps, marital problems have become more visible than before. There are increasing opportunities where friends post complaints about their husbands on SNS or bring up consultations in group chats.
However, precisely because we live in the digital age, the wisdom of this proverb may be more important than ever. Comments and “likes” online remain as records and can have lasting effects. The risk of casual advice causing unexpected trouble has also increased.
On the other hand, in modern times, social awareness of serious problems in marital relationships, such as domestic violence and psychological abuse, has also increased. In such cases, rather than overlooking them as something that “even dog does not eat,” it is necessary to encourage consultation with appropriate specialized institutions.
Furthermore, with the increase in working women and diversification of values, the nature of marriage itself is changing. This proverb, which is based on traditional marital images, also requires modern interpretation. What’s important is to have the discernment to see the essence without being misled by superficial conflicts.
When AI Hears This
Dogs are said to have a sense of smell one million times stronger than humans, yet this supernatural sensory organ supposedly avoids only “marital quarrels”—a premise that conceals the strange essence of human relationships.
Dogs will readily eat rotten meat. They consume garbage, and sometimes even their own excrement—they are omnivores. In other words, there is virtually nothing that dogs “cannot eat.” Yet even such dogs will not “eat” marital quarrels.
This is not merely a physical matter. A dog’s superior sense of smell can detect minute emotional changes that humans cannot perceive. For example, it has been scientifically proven that dogs can identify their owner’s illness or pregnancy through scent. The reason such dogs avoid marital quarrels is that they contain emotions so complex and contradictory that they cause “indigestion.”
Love and hatred, dependence and independence, understanding and misunderstanding. Marital relationships where these exist simultaneously are incomprehensible to animals that live by simple instinct. For dogs, emotions are a binary choice of “like” or “dislike,” but married couples calmly maintain the contradictory state of “disliking because they like.”
In other words, dogs do not eat marital quarrels because they represent a uniquely human “emotional paradox” that transcends animal logic.
Lessons for Today
What this proverb teaches us in modern times is “the wisdom of maintaining appropriate distance.” When we see someone’s complaints on SNS or hear about a colleague’s family matters at work, we naturally want to give caring advice, but it’s important to pause and think about it.
In human relationships, there’s no need to stick your nose into everything. Rather, there are cases where you can protect others by not getting involved. Marital and family problems have complex backgrounds that only the parties involved can understand. We need to understand that what we see from the outside is only the tip of the iceberg and maintain a humble attitude.
However, this doesn’t mean coldly pushing people away. Extending a helping hand when necessary while warmly watching over them at other times. This sense of balance is the key to building mature human relationships.
In modern society, information overflows and other people’s private lives are easily visible. That’s precisely why, by acquiring the “wise sense of distance” that this proverb possesses, both you and those around you should be able to build more comfortable relationships. Sometimes stepping back and watching over is also an important expression of love.
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