Things Brought Together Will Come Apart: Japanese Proverb Meaning

Proverbs

How to Read “Things brought together will come apart”

awasemono wa hawaremono

Meaning of “Things brought together will come apart”

“Things brought together will come apart” means that relationships formed artificially tend to fall apart easily.

This proverb teaches us that human connections based on interests, calculations, or external convenience are more fragile than those born from natural feelings and genuine empathy.

People use this saying when pointing out that even seemingly good relationships won’t last if they were formed artificially.

For example, it explains why arranged marriages don’t always work out, why business partnerships based only on profit often fail, or why friendships forced by parents rarely continue.

The essence of this proverb remains true today. Superficial connections on social media or relationships based purely on self-interest don’t last long.

This is exactly what the saying tells us. True bonds are born from natural empathy and trust.

Origin and Etymology

The exact first appearance of this proverb in literature is unclear. However, the structure of the phrase shows the sharp observation Japanese people have about human relationships.

Let’s look at the word “awasemono” (things brought together). It refers to things joined artificially or intentionally.

When you sew pieces of cloth together or repair broken pottery, these physical “things brought together” can never match something that was whole from the start. They peel apart easily at the seams and are weak against impact.

This proverb applies this physical phenomenon to human relationships. Political marriages, alliances based on interests, or calculated friendships are not formed through natural emotional flow.

When the original purpose is lost or circumstances change, these relationships dissolve easily. The saying captures this essential truth about human connections.

Some scholars suggest this observation became a fixed expression during the Edo period merchant culture. As artificial relationships like contracts and transactions increased, people noticed these patterns.

The proverb expresses a universal truth: the strength of human bonds depends greatly on how they began.

Usage Examples

  • The couple was united through a political marriage, but as “things brought together will come apart,” they ended up living separately after just a few years
  • Since they’re business partners who teamed up only for profit, like “things brought together will come apart,” they’ll probably disband as soon as it stops being profitable

Universal Wisdom

The proverb “Things brought together will come apart” touches on a fundamental truth about human relationships. It reveals that the strength of a relationship is determined by how it begins.

Humans are social creatures, so sometimes we must form relationships based on calculation or convenience.

However, our ancestors saw through the fragility of such connections after thousands of years of experience. Artificially formed relationships lack the power to persevere when facing difficulties.

Naturally born friendships and love have bonds that transcend logic. They involve empathy, trust, and affirmation of the other person’s very existence.

In contrast, relationships formed through interests or convenience lose their reason to exist when those interests disappear. Like glue that peels off when it dries, people separate once their purpose is achieved.

This proverb has been passed down through generations because humans have an instinct to distinguish the “real” from the “fake.”

Even when relationships look the same on the surface, different roots lead to different endings. Our ancestors expressed this essence of human relationships through the clever metaphor of “things brought together.”

This wisdom speaks to us as an unchanging truth, even in our modern world where human connections have become increasingly complex.

When AI Hears This

All matter in the universe inevitably moves toward disorder when left alone. This is the second law of thermodynamics.

For example, an organized room becomes messy if you do nothing. Sugar water stirred in a cup will never naturally separate back into sugar and water. This one-way flow from order to disorder actually applies directly to human relationships.

When two people meet and build a relationship, they’re creating a specific combination from countless humans. Physically speaking, this is a highly ordered state, meaning low entropy.

However, according to universal laws, this order can only move toward collapse. Without contact, people grow distant. Without meeting, relationships fade. Eventually they return to the disordered state of “strangers.” This is unavoidable as a physical law.

What’s interesting is that maintaining order always requires energy input. Just as a refrigerator uses electricity to slow food spoilage (entropy increase), human relationships need continuous energy through contact, conversation, and shared experiences.

A “relationship that continues without effort” cannot exist according to physical laws. This proverb was a surprisingly scientific observation that applied fundamental universal principles to human relationships.

Lessons for Today

This proverb teaches modern people the importance of developing an eye for judging relationship quality.

What determines life’s richness is not your follower count on social media or how many business cards you’ve exchanged. It’s how many relationships you have where hearts truly connect.

Modern society especially risks turning all relationships into “things brought together” by prioritizing efficiency and profit. But this proverb sounds a warning.

Relationships built only on calculation won’t support you when you face difficulties.

That’s why you should cherish relationships that grow naturally over time. Nurture connections based not on immediate usefulness, but on whether you empathize with the person and feel comfortable together.

Also, reflect on whether you yourself have become a “thing brought together” relationship for someone else.

True trust is born when both people value each other’s very existence. Such relationships become irreplaceable treasures that help you weather life’s storms together.

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