How to Read “Do not speak of others’ shortcomings, do not boast of your own strengths”
Hito no tan o iu koto nakare, onore no chō o toku koto nakare
Meaning of “Do not speak of others’ shortcomings, do not boast of your own strengths”
This proverb teaches two important rules for human relationships. First, don’t talk about other people’s faults or weaknesses. Second, don’t brag about your own good points or talents.
When you point out someone’s flaws, you hurt them. But you also lower your own character. When you show off your strengths, you make others feel uncomfortable or inferior. This damages your relationships.
The proverb teaches the importance of humility and consideration. These values matter in all areas of modern life. They apply at work, at school, and at home.
Today, people sometimes criticize others on social media. They also post too much about their own success. These are exactly the behaviors this proverb warns against.
Origin and Etymology
This proverb likely comes from Chinese classical teachings. Confucian philosophy especially valued humility and consideration for others. These were seen as important virtues.
“Tan” means shortcomings or faults. “Chō” means strengths or good points. “Iu” is an old way of saying “to speak.”
Similar expressions appear in Japanese teaching books from the Edo period. Warriors and merchants learned these lessons as important guidelines. Back then, maintaining good relationships was essential for daily life.
People believed that pointing out others’ faults or bragging about yourself would destroy relationships. This wisdom spread widely through society.
The proverb uses a parallel structure. It pairs two warnings together. “Do not speak of others’ shortcomings” and “do not boast of your own strengths” work as a set.
This creates balance. The first half warns against criticizing others. The second half warns against showing off. Together, they show how to treat both others and yourself properly.
This parallel form makes the proverb easy to remember. It also gives the teaching more weight. Instead of just saying “be humble,” it gives specific actions to avoid. This makes it practical and useful.
Usage Examples
- Even after his success, he follows the principle “Do not speak of others’ shortcomings, do not boast of your own strengths,” so everyone trusts him
- I remind myself “Do not speak of others’ shortcomings, do not boast of your own strengths” and try to stay humble today
Universal Wisdom
Humans have a strange quality. We see others’ faults incredibly clearly, but we can’t see our own. We think our strengths are big, but others’ strengths seem small.
This proverb comes from understanding this basic human weakness. It offers wisdom born from seeing how people really are.
Why do people want to talk about others’ shortcomings? Because putting others down makes us feel relatively better. Why do we want to talk about our own strengths? Because we want recognition and approval.
These are natural human feelings. But if we act on them directly, our relationships fall apart.
Our ancestors understood human nature deeply. That’s why they clearly warned against these two behaviors. Pointing out others’ faults or bragging about yourself might make you look good temporarily.
But in the long run, you lose trust. You end up isolated.
Truly excellent people can find others’ strengths. They can admit their own weaknesses. This proverb shows the path to that kind of mature character.
Times change, but human psychology doesn’t. That’s why this teaching still speaks to our hearts today.
When AI Hears This
From an information theory perspective, talking about others’ shortcomings or your own strengths adds “redundant noise” to communication. Shannon’s theory shows that channel capacity depends on the signal-to-noise ratio.
As noise increases, the information you really want to send becomes harder to receive.
These types of information have special properties. Information about others’ shortcomings is either “already known” or “impossible to verify.” In information theory, known information has zero information value.
Meanwhile, information about your own strengths creates “reliability bias” between sender and receiver. Self-reported strengths have lower credibility than third-party observations. Receivers must always “discount” them.
More importantly, these messages function as “inverse correlation noise.” The more you talk about others’ shortcomings, the lower your own credibility drops. This increases the signal decay rate for all future communications.
The same happens when you talk about your own strengths. Once recognized as noise, even your useful information gets filtered as “possibly noise.”
These statements aren’t just one-time noise. They function as “system noise” that permanently degrades the transmission quality of the entire channel.
Lessons for Today
This proverb teaches you what true strength really is. With social media everywhere, we constantly compare ourselves to others and others to us. The temptation is stronger than ever.
We want to point out others’ flaws to feel superior. We want to show off our success to get approval.
But truly attractive people are different. They focus on others’ strengths, not their faults. They quietly build their own success. This isn’t weakness. It comes from genuine self-confidence.
You can start practicing today. When you want to say something bad about someone, find one good thing about them instead. When you want to brag about your achievement, thank someone who supported you instead.
When you do this, trust and respect naturally gather around you.
Human relationships work like mirrors. When you show humility and consideration, others treat you the same way. This proverb gives you a simple but powerful key to building happy relationships.
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