My Own Single Hardship Over Another’s Ten Hardships: Japanese Proverb Meaning

Proverbs

How to Read “My own single hardship over another’s ten hardships”

Hito no jūnan yori waga ichiman

Meaning of “My own single hardship over another’s ten hardships”

This proverb expresses an honest human psychology. No matter how great someone else’s difficulties are, your own small hardship feels much harder to bear.

You might objectively know that someone else faces a far more serious situation. But you’re the one actually feeling the pain and suffering.

You can understand another person’s difficulties with your mind. But you feel your own difficulties with your entire body. This difference in sensation greatly distorts your judgment.

For example, you hear news that a friend has a serious illness. Yet your own toothache bothers you more.

A coworker tells you their company went bankrupt. But you can’t sleep worrying about your own small mistake. Haven’t we all had experiences like these?

This proverb doesn’t blame human weakness or selfishness. Rather, it acknowledges “that’s just how humans are.”

It allows you to be honest with your feelings. At the same time, it encourages you not to forget an objective perspective. This is a balanced teaching.

Origin and Etymology

No clear written records remain about the origin of this proverb. However, we can make interesting observations from the structure of the words.

The contrast between “ten hardships” and “one hardship” is striking. Ten symbolically represents many difficulties as a number of completion.

Meanwhile, one is the smallest unit. This extreme contrast vividly expresses the gap between objective size and subjective feeling.

The contrast between “another’s” and “my own” is also important. It shows the basic structure of human relationships between others and self.

Traditional Japanese society has valued consideration and empathy for others. Yet at the same time, human nature inevitably prioritizes oneself first.

This proverb frankly expresses this contradictory psychology.

It probably arose spontaneously from people’s everyday experiences. It captured a universal psychological state that everyone experiences in simple words. That’s why it has been passed down for so long.

We can imagine it took root during the Edo period among common people’s lives. They acknowledged each other’s weaknesses and sometimes used it self-mockingly.

Perhaps wisdom is embedded here. Rather than denying honest human emotions, it accepts them. This acceptance actually deepens understanding of others.

Usage Examples

  • News about the neighbor’s house fire matters less than tomorrow’s presentation I’m worried about. This is truly “my own single hardship over another’s ten hardships.”
  • I comfort my friend about their exam failure, yet my own small heartbreak feels much harder. “My own single hardship over another’s ten hardships” is well said.

Universal Wisdom

“My own single hardship over another’s ten hardships” shows a fundamental limit in human perception. We can never completely understand another person’s pain. Pain is essentially a subjective experience.

This truth highlights an eternal challenge in forming human society. Empathy and compassion are praised as virtues.

Yet in reality, our small worries overshadow other people’s great suffering. This isn’t a moral defect. It’s a structural feature of humans as biological beings.

What’s interesting is that the society that created this proverb didn’t deny this human limitation. Instead, it acknowledged it.

Rather than demanding perfect altruism, wisdom here seeks ways to coexist with others. It accepts human self-centeredness as a premise.

This proverb also teaches the importance of self-awareness. You realize “I’m someone who feels my small worries more heavily than others’ suffering.”

Only with this awareness can you take the first step toward objective judgment. Knowing your emotional bias paradoxically leads to consideration for others. This is a paradoxical truth.

Humans cannot become completely fair beings. But by knowing our imperfections, we can get a little closer to others.

This humble understanding of humanity is why this proverb has been passed down through the ages.

When AI Hears This

The human sensory system has fascinating characteristics. When you sense sound volume or light brightness, your brain doesn’t judge by absolute intensity of stimulation.

Instead, it judges by the rate of change from the original state. This is called the Weber-Fechner law.

For example, dropping a pencil in a quiet library catches attention. But dropping the same pencil on a noisy station platform goes unnoticed.

The same sound changes in perceived intensity based on its ratio to surrounding conditions.

This law also applies to how we feel pain and suffering. Pain that others experience doesn’t directly input into our nervous system.

We receive it only as information at baseline zero. Meanwhile, our own pain inputs directly through nerves. It’s continuously compared.

Even a small headache represents a change rate from no pain to pain that approaches infinity.

What’s more important is that the human brain has limits on sensory information it can process simultaneously. When your own pain constantly occupies processing resources, another person’s suffering gets treated as a relatively weak signal.

This isn’t a matter of moral character. It’s a physical constraint of the sensory processing system.

Empathy has biological costs. Self-sensation takes priority due to unavoidable features in brain design.

Lessons for Today

This proverb teaches modern people how to deal with their own emotions. When you get trapped in your small worries, it’s not because you’re a cold person. That’s the natural human condition.

What matters is how you act after knowing this tendency in yourself. You don’t need to deny your feelings.

If your tooth hurts, it’s okay to feel pain. If a small failure bothers you, it’s okay to worry. Those emotions are real.

But at the same time, develop a habit of stepping back to think. Just noticing “right now, I might only see my own situation” broadens your perspective.

Value your own single hardship while not forgetting the existence of another’s ten hardships. This balance is the attitude of a mature adult.

When you feel down seeing someone’s success on social media, when your small anxiety swells up, remember this proverb.

Your way of feeling is normal. After acknowledging that, try looking at the wider world just a little more.

That small shift in awareness will make you a richer person.

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