How to Read “Wait for the end in relationships and life”
En to ukiyo wa sue wo mate
Meaning of “Wait for the end in relationships and life”
This proverb teaches that we should watch relationships and life’s changes until the end, without making judgments halfway through.
In human relationships, you shouldn’t judge someone based only on first impressions or temporary events. A friend you’ve grown distant from might reconnect with you deeply at some point in life.
Even a relationship that seems painful now might reveal its meaning as time passes.
The same applies to how the world changes. A situation that looks unfortunate now might turn out differently in the end. On the flip side, being at your peak now doesn’t mean you can let your guard down.
People use this proverb when they want to tell someone who’s rushing to conclusions that it’s important to take more time and watch carefully.
Even today, this saying reminds us to take a long-term view, especially when we tend to demand immediate results.
Origin and Etymology
The exact first written appearance of this proverb is unclear. However, people likely used it among common folk by the Edo period.
The structure pairs two words: “en” (relationships) and “ukiyo” (the floating world).
“En” comes from Buddhist thought and means encounters and connections between people. “Ukiyo” refers to this ever-changing world, the fleeting present life.
Originally written as “uki yo” meaning a painful, suffering world, it changed to “ukiyo” during the Edo period. This shift emphasized the constantly changing nature of society.
“Sue wo mate” means “wait for the end.” The word “sue” refers to the final outcome of something.
In other words, the teaching says to watch both relationships and worldly changes until the very end, without judging midway.
This proverb reflects Japanese perspectives on time and human relationships. The culture values watching things with a long view rather than making quick judgments.
Life is long. Today’s enemy might become tomorrow’s ally. A smooth-sailing situation might suddenly reverse.
This wisdom comes from people who understood these subtle truths of life through experience.
Interesting Facts
The word “ukiyo” appears in “ukiyo-e” (woodblock prints) and “ukiyo-zoshi” (popular fiction), both representing Edo period culture.
People of that time developed a culture of enjoying the changing world. They transformed this momentary yet vibrant sensibility into art.
The “ukiyo” in this proverb reflects that same era’s atmosphere.
The concept of “en” is deeply rooted in how Japanese people view relationships. There’s a saying “sode furi au mo tasho no en” (even brushing sleeves is a connection from past lives).
This shows how Japanese people treasure connections and value the spirit of “ichigo ichie” (once in a lifetime). This proverb also comes from that culture of cherishing relationships.
Usage Examples
- We parted after a fight, but “wait for the end in relationships and life,” so maybe we’ll meet again someday
- Even though business is bad now, “wait for the end in relationships and life,” so let’s not rush and take the long view
Universal Wisdom
Humans tend to judge everything based only on what’s right in front of them. Today’s enemy is an eternal enemy. Today’s friend is an eternal friend.
We assume today’s hardship will last forever, and today’s happiness will continue forever. But people who lived long lives knew better.
When you add the element of time, all relationships and situations change.
This proverb has been passed down because it has universal value as a warning against our “tendency to rush to conclusions.”
Anxiety and impatience make us want clear answers. Is this person friend or foe? Is this situation good or bad?
But life isn’t that simple.
As time passes, people’s hearts change, situations shift, and new information emerges. Words from your parents that you couldn’t understand when young suddenly make sense as you age.
Painful experiences become life treasures in hindsight. Everyone has had such experiences.
Our ancestors knew that life needs “aging.” Just as wine develops deep flavors over time, relationships and life events reveal their true value only when time adds its seasoning.
When AI Hears This
In complexity science, systems with many interacting elements create “emergence.” Emergence means properties suddenly appear in the whole that individual elements couldn’t predict.
For example, a single water molecule has no “wave” property, but countless water molecules together create waves.
Human relationships work exactly this way. The meeting of Person A and B, the connection between B and C—each is a small contact point.
But over time, unexpected networks form, and surprising opportunities and developments “emerge.”
Even more interesting is the connection to the butterfly effect discovered by meteorologist Lorenz. Tiny differences in initial conditions expand exponentially over time.
A difference of 0.001 becomes 10 times, then 100 times larger after several steps. In life terms, whether you greeted someone today or not—that small choice might draw a completely different map of relationships six months later.
This proverb says “wait for the end” because people intuitively understood complex systems’ time evolution. Systems need time for sufficient interaction and emergence to occur.
Judging good or bad from the initial state alone is like looking at only the first step of an equation and drawing conclusions.
It’s remarkable that people centuries ago reached the same insight as modern nonlinear science.
Lessons for Today
Modern society demands quick decisions. Social media delivers instant evaluations. Business praises rapid judgment.
But this proverb offers us a different perspective. Not everything requires immediate judgment.
In human relationships, this proverb is especially important. Don’t judge someone based on first impressions or a single mistake.
Give yourself room to nurture relationships over time. Someone you can’t understand now might become irreplaceable as you both grow and circumstances change.
At work or life’s crossroads, remember you have the option to watch a bit longer before rushing to conclusions.
Today’s hardship won’t last forever. Today’s success isn’t guaranteed forever either.
However, this doesn’t mean doing nothing and just watching. It means actively observing situations carefully, sensing changes, and waiting for the right timing.
Your life has unseen developments waiting ahead. Without rushing, but with hope, keep watching for that “end.”


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